This Christmas will be our second without my husband and my kids’ father. I cannot honestly tell you whether so far it has been easier or harder than the first. All I can say is that it is different. The first Christmas after Garry died was only two months after his passing. I was very […]
Finding Joy When Holidays are Hard
A New Chapter
As you read this I am on my way to a very special place. This morning my alarm woke me at 4:00 a.m. Normally, I’d be a very grumpy person that early in the morning, but today I am making an important journey. Today I am headed to Asheville, North Carolina, a place that I […]
Honoring an Absent Dad on Father’s Day
One of the hardest parts about losing my husband has been carrying the knowledge that my kids will grow up without such a beloved and important figure in their lives. As we come up on Father’s Day, this knowledge gnaws at me and has been making me dread a day I used to enjoy celebrating. […]
Waiting on Sunday
I was crying with my mom on the phone on Friday evening as I told her that I felt as though all the magic and joy had been sucked out of the holidays for me. After losing Garry in October, we have had to endure a rapid succession of “firsts”, whether we were ready for […]
Even Now, It Was All Worth It
When you lose someone suddenly and unexpectedly, I think it’s a natural response to look back on your life together and wonder if there were signs you should’ve seen that could have warned you. You wonder if there was anything you could have done differently to change what ultimately happened. You start playing the “what […]
Too Soon a Widow
On Wednesday, October 25, I woke up in the early morning hours to a nightmare. I will spare you all the details of that horrible night, mostly because I don’t want to relive it any more than I have to. But within a few hours of when the nightmare started, I found myself sitting in […]